[Epic Poetry] Song of a Grumpy Siren

Hark you happy sailor

Who drown not 

In a thousand hurricanes

But cheap Rum and wine

This is a song of a siren

Who has wings and beak

A Siren is not a mermaid

And once never was

The journey begins with a captain

Who was favoured by Fortune

Where Fortune is a woman

That favours the young and bold

There was a grandiose ship

That sailed like the beat of pulse

Sometimes sailed by the wind

Sometimes sailed by the stars

Together with the fantastic crews

A splendour underneath the moon

They had entered into the deep pass

An unacquainted land

The Captain is also an adventurer 

For nothing can stop the voyager 

From not a quest of gold and treasure

But a quest to the great unknown

To the end of the earth shall we

Beyond the rim of our tiny sea

Where no nautical charts ever mapped

Where no tales were ever told

Drums on the northern wind

Sails on the black water

Guns on deck, never fired

Songs of a long night they were told

Out of the new land a whirlwind rose 

Joyful they were, would later weep

When the anchor was lost

And they rose from the ocean floor

Hark you happy sailors

We greet you from the sea

Were you able to recognize

Sadness in your eyes, hunger in mine

There was not a single bay

For your souls' great despair 

And there was not a single shore

Betwixt the bosom of the sea

Let us both descend

Into the night and ocean bed

Where we shall gayly wed

Yum, Your body and soul in mine

And downward they should go

But only not just yet

When Captain first met the Siren

Like they met a thousand times

With eyes of bright sapphire 

Treasures of the seven seas

With long thread of golden hair

Gilded with morning star

When Siren first met the Captain

Despite her sisters' grave protests

Wishing to learn more about Ganymede

She had changed her wicked mind

'Fair Siren, have we met before?'

'Who knows? Maybe in another life

Until we meet again, Sailor,

Until the sea above us closed again.'

Hence continued journey to the Captain

Blessed not by the hound of hell

Nor the almighty lord of all

When he approached open sea

Not long after the ship finally

Reached an unknown shore

Exhausted crew sighed and breathed

Invited to the governor's house

At the table, a banquet of ignorance

On the table, a bouquet of flamboyance

When not a soul was aware

Gradually wormed its way out there

Between white nameless flowers

And Crimson tablecloths

Extra dark wine were poured

Fancy dinner served

Captain looked down the silver platter

And asked curiously indeed

'May I wonder, what breed is it?'

Answered 'Twas a chatty lamb'

'So, brave sailors, what say you?

What are you thinking you're doing here

In this great virgin land

Whom had engaged with a man?'

'Worry not, respected sir

We are on the quest of benign discovery

Also seeking vital supplicants

After encountering mistresses of the sea'

'I hear ya, so tell me, Captain

How did you made it here

Right across the no man land

T's a miracle or a doom?'

The Captain, young in years

Though lacking the associated folly

Thought just one step more

Decided to disclose selectively indeed

'Atlas, you would not see us here

had we not tied ourselves on 

longeron, hands bounded by sailor's bow

Ears stuffed with drying straws'

Contemplated the Governor

Whom nodded and continued 

'Ay, a clever move indeed

You may escape from the Sirens, but----

'----but you shan't escape from me!'

Governor raised his fatty hands

Entered a swarm of men

Armed from the toe, none in heads

'I shall kindly correct myself

They are not really chatty lambs

Instead of ask what you just ate

Try the word who instead'

The crew may escaped the Sirens

But not Governors' tempered wine

Before the light of day ascend

Darkness gladly took over

Before sunken into man-made slumber

The crew heard Governor's evil laughter 

'Be marry, my people, how could you not

When I booked you next week's dinners?'

When they thought they were treated

As Hannibals at the gate

Stranger in a stranger land

Surprise! T’s cannibal at the feast！

An indefinite time later

Fair Captain woke up first in dungeon 

Gazing hopelessly to the dizzy crews

He knew they'd need an escape plan

But how can they break free

From a cage without door?

Wait a moment, with no open

How did they first gotten in?

Panic, like baby spiders

Hatched from their hatchling states

And climbed on the sailors' table

Wait, they does not have one

The Captain, never short of quick wits

Now hopes he was a serpent

Who could simply use its fangs

For enemies flee with a second

But oh Captain oh Captain

Now you are with all your delicacies

A swarm of fluffy mice

Ready to be served as the entree course

Think, Captain, not of the last dinner

But like a usury Boss (or Cheif)

He thought so near hell is waiting

Before raised head saw the ceiling

"Wake up! My courageous crews,

This is not the end!

All we need is to from a pile,"

Thus he addressed the living dead 

"All we need is prayer instead!"

Courageous crews outrageously said

"Aha, but I just traded my bible

Last dock with that profiteer"

The Captain wished to bang his head

But so good there's something

Selfcorrect, someone waiting for him

So he explained his plan in laymen's word

"But correct me if I'm wrong, Captain"

Said bright first mate in brighter bread

"Even if we reached the topper gate

How can we open it?"

The Captain confidently answered

Urgent time need metaphysical measures

Judging from encounters with the Sirens

They seems had got one

So layer by layer one by one

The cook who weight a ton on the bottom

Fair slim Captain on the top

A puppy pile was formed

Just about to reach the ceiling door

Miraculously, the Captain oust a fishbone

Where did he get it from?

Used it in lock as a pin and smiled

Captain got several trick under his belt

That is to say, before gotten in

Royal Navy's most wanted list

Captain actually transferred from

Another less wanted petty thief 

But who were they to judge

Their wonderful savouir from the dish

Not to even mention 

He is indeed their Captain

Hence Sailors swarmed out

Swiftly as Viking's northern wind

Sneaky out of the mansion they went

For they were outnumbered, why risk avenge?

While slaughter was unneeded

Supplies were a different tale

The crews slided to the shipbuilding dock

Twisting shadow, moon high above

Sewing back their beloved sail

With their old granny's care

Even repainted the beauty's body

Partially with waterproof pine oil

Then to the storage shall we

The guards were dreaming of upcoming feasts

Not wishing to eat more chatty lambs

Dry or fresh

They opted for tomatoes instead

If God only left you with lemons

Make lemonade with Rum

If God forbid your liquor stock

Settle with virgin Bloody Magret instead  

So dry tomatoes and parsley flakes

Plus the mad Governer's private blends

"Hey! My crew, control urself

Don't get wasted before we leave the shore once more"

So naive to the divine will

They thought they can finally rest

With expensive booze on the deck

Temporary wives on hammock bed

They they woke by cannon fired 

"What's the matter?" Sleepy mode

"British Navy, only couple hundred yards!"

Young Rigger dropped his tele-mic

Quickly Captain made the Rigger

Raise the flag painted NEUTRAL with tomato sauce

"Neutral buggers go to hell!"

Quoting Dante, the Briton shouts

"But explorers cannot fight "

The Captain replied with another sign

Yet quartermaster masterly spelled 

NEUTRAL EXPLOITER not received well）

......

Wit of Poseidon suddenly strikes

Answered the Siren

'You can live on land at day

And come to me at night in sea'

Shocked Captain shook his head

'I doubt that will work smoothly

Through a single night time

For I am a man with lungs, not fins'

The Siren protested vigorously

A wrong part of speech

'Siren don't have fins!

But Mighty Magique of the ocean'

'I don't care where we shall live

As long as we live together'

Captain’s warm confession is somewhat tainted

by a strong stress on 'live'

......

Siren finally relented

And moved with the groom

Into the sweet land he called home

Without tears, without blues

But happier she is once in a while

When the ship sails again

They have a Siren accompany

Literally in front indeed

Thus as all story ends

They lived happily after together

In extravagant Roman style

A king sized giant bathtub

Made of diamonds and gold

From Captain bestseller's 

related copyrighted books

By Aran Meredith.

composed circa 2017

edited in Jan 2021.